There are many people who say that Shakespeare is the man responsible for inventing these jokes. How true that is will never be known. However, should it be decided that the bard himself deserves the credit, surely that raises the validity in knock knock jokes being a viable form of humor. The more traditionally accepted history is that knock knock jokes started in and around the United States in the 1940s. While not as prestigious as Shakespeare, whoever has the right to claim the patent on these jokes deserves their place in the annals of history. While they may be primarily viewed as childish jokes, they remain popular among humorists of all ages. So, without further aplomb, let’s take a look at the best knock knock jokes of all time.
30 Best Knock Knock Jokes for Kids
As we alluded to above, the knock knock joke is a schoolyard classic. Children the world over have their own variations and collections of these punny jokes. Inoffensive and straightforward, knock knock jokes come from a place of innocence. A sense of humor is a great thing to have, and it is important to cultivate it from a young age. Being able to tell a joke is a great way to break the ice and make a good impression on people. For many people, knock knock jokes are their first introduction to comedy. Both in terms of delivering and being the audience. So, with that said, let’s look at some of the all-time classic knock knock jokes for kids.
- Knock, knock–Who’s there?Tank.–Tank who?You’re Welcome!
- Knock, knock–Who’s there?Nobel.–Nobel who?Nobel… that’s why I knocked!
- Knock, knock–Who’s there?Luke.–Luke who?Luke through the peephole and find out.
- Knock, knock–Who’s there?Cow says.–Cow says who?No, a cow says mooooo!
- Knock Knock–Who’s there?Says.–Says who?Says me!
- Knock, knock–Who’s there?A little old lady.–A little old lady who?Wow, I didn’t know you could yodel!
- Knock, knock–Who’s there?Banana.–Banana who?Knock, knock.–Who’s there?Banana.–Banana who?Knock, knock.–Who’s there?Orange.–Orange who?Orange you glad I didn’t say banana?
- Knock, knock–Who’s there?Water.–Water who?Water you doing telling jokes right now? Open the door and let me in.
- Knock, knock–Who’s there?Iran.–Iran who?Iran here. I’m tired so let me in.
- Knock, knock–Who’s there?Lettuce.–Lettuce who?Lettuce in, it’s cold out here!
- Knock, knock–Who’s there?Boo.–Boo who?Boo hoo? Don’t cry; it’s just a joke.
- Knock, knock–Who’s there?Stopwatch.–Stopwatch who?Stopwatch you’re doing and let me in!
- Knock, knockWho’s there?–Spell.Spell who?–W. H. O.
- Knock, knock–Who’s there?Voodoo.–Voodoo who?Voodoo you think you are?
- Knock, knock–Who’s there?Mustache.–Mustache who?I mustache you a few questions.
- Knock, knock–Who’s there?Iva.–Iva who?Iva sore hand from knocking.
- Knock, knock–Who’s there?Isabelle.–Isabelle who?Isabelle necessary on a bicycle?
- Knock, knock–Who’s there?A herd.–A herd who?A herd you were home, so here I am!
- Knock, knock–Who’s there?Althea.–Althea who?Althea later, alligator!
- Knock, knock–Who’s there?Amish.–Amish who?Awwww, that’s sweet. I miss you too.
- Knock, knock–Who’s there?Candice.–Candice who?Candice door open now; it’s raining.
- Knock, knock–Who’s there?God bless.–God bless who?Thank you, God bless you too.
- Knock, knock–Who’s there?Norma Lee.–Norma Lee, who?Norma Lee I don’t knock on random doors, but I had to meet you!
- Knock, knockWho’s there?–Imma.Imma who?–Imma catch a cold if you don’t open the door!
- Knock, knock–Who’s there?Ivor.–Ivor who?Ivor you let me in, or I’ll climb through the window.
- Knock, knock.–Who’s there?Hatch.–Hatch who?God bless you.
- Knock, knock.–Who’s there?Adore.–Adore who?Adore is between us. Open up!
- Knock, knock.–Who’s there?Cargo.–Cargo who?No, car go beep beep!
- Knock, knock.–Who’s there?Pecan!–Pecan who?Pecan somebody your own size!
- Knock, knock.–Who’s there?Cash.–Cash who?No thanks, but I’d love some peanuts!
30 Funny Knock Knock Jokes for All Ages
While knock knock jokes are for kids, you can tell them to anybody. The following collection of jokes are still clean and could be considered appropriate for all ages, rather than just kids. Some of them might be a little more thought-provoking or require a more mature idea of the world to truly appreciate the depth of humor. If you want to master the best knock knock jokes, you need an expansive knowledge of them. But, while the depth of your repertoire may cause groans and eye rolls at family gatherings, you will be the one laughing last when it comes to entertaining the small people that eventually come into your life. Not loudest, though, because of how funny your best knock knock jokes are, your audience will be making the most noise. Enough of the niceties, onwards with the best knock knock jokes for people of all ages. 31. Knock, knock–Who’s there?Ben.–Ben who?Ben knocking for ages now, open the door. 32. Knock, knock–Who’s there?Nun ya.–Nun ya who?Nun ya business, just open up. 33. Knock, knock–Who’s there?Wooden shoe.–Wooden shoe who?Wooden you like to hear another knock, knock joke! 34. Knock, knock–Who’s there?Alex.–Alex who?Alex plain later just let me in. 35. Knock, knock–Who’s there?Snow.–Snow who?Snow laughing matter, it’s raining, open up. 36. Knock, knock–Who’s there?Dozen.–Dozen who?Dozen anybody want to let me in? 37. Will you remember me in a minute?–Yes.Will you remember me in a week?–Yes.Knock, knock.–Who’s there?You didn’t remember me! 38. Knock, knock–Who’s there?Scold.–Scold who?Scold enough out here to go ice skating! 39. Knock, knock–Who’s there?Alien.–Alien who?Um, how many aliens do you know? 40. Knock, knock–Who’s there?Butter.–Butter who?Butter open that door quick, I have to go to the bathroom. 41. Knock, knock–Who’s there?Amarillo.–Amarillo who?Amarillo nice guy so so let me in. 42. Knock, knock–Who’s there?Wooden shoe.–Wooden shoe who?Wooden shoe like to know. 43. Knock, knock–Who’s there?Honeydew.–Honeydew who?Honeydew wanna dance with me? 44. Knock, knock–Who’s there?Broken pencil–Broken pencil who?Never mind, this joke is pointless. 45. Knock, knock–Who’s there?Control freak … now you need to say control freak who. 46. Say knock knock–Knock KnockWho’s there?–… 47. Knock, knock–Who’s there?Police hurry.–Police hurry who?Police hurry up and open the door it’s freezing out here. 48. Knock, knock–Who’s there?Ho-ho.–Ho-ho who?Wow, that Santa impression was terrible. 49. Knock, knock–Who’s there?Ice cream soda.–Ice cream soda who?Ice cream soda people can hear me. 50. Knock, knock–Who’s there?Interrupting sheep.–Interruption sheep wh…Baaaa! 51. Knock, knock–Who’s there?Cereal.–Cereal who?Cereal pleasure to meet you, please open the door. 52. Knock, knock–Who’s there?Euripides.–Euripides who?Euripides jeans and you’re going to have to buy a new pair. 53. Knock, knock–Who’s there?Ida.–Ida who?I think you’ll find it’s pronounced Idaho! 54. Knock, knock–Who’s there?Annie.–Annie who?Annie chance you want to go for a drink? 55. Knock, knock–Who’s there?Closure.–Closure who?Closure mouth when eating, it’s disgusting. 56. Knock, knock–Who’s there?You. –You who? You hoo, anybody home? 57. Knock, knock.–Who’s there?Linda.–Linda who?Linda Hand, will ya? Mine is tired from knocking. 58. Knock, knock.–Who’s there?I am.–I am who?I am who is knocking. Who are you? 59. Knock, knock.–Who’s there?Ray D.–Ray D. who?Ray D or not, here I come. 60. Knock, knock.–Who’s there?I. O.– tI. O. who?Me. When are you paying me back?
25 Dirty Knock Knock Jokes for After the Watershed
While it is true that the best knock knock jokes are meant to be for young ears, there are, of course, plenty of adult slanted jokes. For many, rude jokes are the best knock knock jokes. They harken us back to our childhood and the immaturity of school ground humor but are laced with innuendo. It’s a sensible progression. Innuendo humor is basically the adult version of childish puns. They are the sort of embarrassing dad-style jokes your creepy uncle would come out with at family gatherings. So, providing you are over eighteen and are not easily offended, scroll onward, internet adventurer, and allow yourself to be entertained by our collection of the naughtiest of knock knock jokes. 61. Knock, knock.–Who’s there?Jamaican.–Jamaican who?Jamaican me horny. 62. Knock, knock!–Who’s there?Asshole!–Asshole who?Open the door and find out, asshole! 63. Knock, knock.–Who’s there?Some!–Some who?Some asshole talking to a knock-knock joke. 64. Knock, knock.–Who’s there?Not someone.–Not someone who?Not someone who will get you laid. 65. Knock, knock.–Who’s there?Madam.–Madam who?Help madam finger is stuck in the door. 66. Knock, knock.–Who’s there?(Sexy voice) Who would you like it to be? 67. Knock, knock.–Who’s there?Amos.–Amos who?A mosquito bit me!Knock, knock.–Who’s there?Andy.–Andy who?And he bit me again! 68. Knock, knock.–Who’s there?Ivana.–Ivana who?Ivana rip your clothes off 69. Knock, knock.–Come in.God damn it. 70. Knock, knock.–Who’s there?Not your wife. 71. Knock, knock.–Who’s there?Nicholas!–Nicholas who?Knickerless girls shouldn’t climb trees. 72. Knock, knock.–Who’s there?Kiss.–Kiss who?Kiss me! 73. Knock, knock.–Who’s there?Ice cream.–Ice cream who?Ice cream all night if you’re lucky. 74. Knock, knock.–Who’s there?Ben Dover.–Ben Dover who?Ben Dover and I’ll give you a big surprise! 75. Knock, knock.–Who’s there?May I come in?–May I come in who?Not until we have a serious discussion about birth control. 76. Knock, knock.–Who’s there?Dozer.–Dozer who?Dozer the biggest breasts I’ve ever seen. 77. Knock, knock.–Who’s there?Howie.–Howie who?Howie gonna hide this affair from your husband? 78. Knock, knock.–Who’s there?Baby owl.–Baby owl who?Baby owl see you later at my place. 79. Knock, knock.–Who’s there?When where.–When where who?Tonight, my place, you and me. 80. Knock, knock.–Who’s there?Bee.–Bee who?I like the view from bee-hind you. 81. Knock, knock.–Who’s there?Gladiator.–Gladiator who?Gladiator during the threesome. 82. Knock, knock.–Who’s there?Ivanna–Ivanna who?Ivanna see your tits. 83. Knock, knock.–Who’s there?Ike.–Ike who?Ike can rock your world, baby. 84. Knock, knock.–Who’s there?Iguana.–Iguana who?Iguana f*$& your butt. 85. Knock, knock–Who’s there?Ivor.–Ivor who?Ivor big cock just for you!
The Importance of Word Choice in a Knock Knock Joke
When telling knock knock jokes, it is essential to make sure you choose the right words and the correct expression. Some words can be said in several ways, and getting it wrong ruins the joke and spoil the illusion. That’s why to tell hilarious knock knock jokes, you need to look for words that are consistent in their pronunciation and work with multiple different puns. For example, the Candice joke is an excellent option for these jokes. When you take the word Candice and turn it into ‘Can this,’ you can easily see the endless string of punchlines. This takes a single joke and gives it multiple uses.
Candice door open?Candice sweet be eaten?Candice parcel be signed for?
The importance of word choice is vital for a successful knock knock joke, and it is also a valuable lesson for children on the power of words.
Final Thoughts on the Best Knock Knock Jokes
There you have it; the best knock knock jokes to give you a well-rounded comedic arsenal for any occasion. While they may not be the pinnacle of humor, there is something wholesome and fun about telling them. The above list is comprehensive but by no means definitive. There would seem to be no end to the number of knock knock jokes out there. Especially when you think about how so many can be reused with slightly different wordings. Do you have any favorite knock knock jokes you would like to share with us? Maybe we’ve missed one off the list, or perhaps you heard one very similar to those listed but different enough to warrant mentioning. The comments are open, and we would love to hear from you.